


Wait for It

by BrightOwl_Old



Series: Best of Wolves and Best of Witches [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/M, Porn with Feelings, Remadora, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-10
Updated: 2016-06-10
Packaged: 2018-07-14 06:44:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7157981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrightOwl_Old/pseuds/BrightOwl_Old
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the wake of Dumbledore's death, Lupin and Tonks retreat to the Shrieking Shack where they make up... make love... make life.</p><p>(Part of a series but stands alone).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wait for It

It was too much. Too much. Greyback attacking another. Dumbledore gone. And Tonks. Tonks humiliating him in front of everyone. His chest tightened. He needed to leave the hospital wing. He had already lost control of his emotions in front of former students. 

Without a word, he put on his cloak and followed Hagrid out and turned down a side corridor. He heard hurried footsteps behind him, and felt Tonks's small hand grasp his arm. 

“Stop, Remus, where are you going?”

“You heard me back there. Now is not the time for this.” He pushed her hand from his arm and quickened his pace out of the castle, but she kept up. 

“Are you going to go run off to the Forest? Sleep in a fucking cave by yourself? We’re all grieving together, let me be with you.”

“You do not understand. You can be so childish.”

“Is that what you mean when you say you’re too old for me? That I’m too childish for you?”

“I said I was not discussing this, I—- LEAVE ME." He roared. She stumbled backward in shock as he raced through the oak front doors. 

…

He was under the Whomping Willow when she found him a quarter of an hour later. The tree was calm, only its leaves rippling in the soft summer breeze.

She sat silently beside him. They stared at the lake, the dark mark reflected on the black water, illuminated by a barely crescent moon. 

“It's been so long since I've looked to the sky and seen something as awful as the moon," Remus said.

Tonks placed her hand on his. He did not object or pull away. 

“I can’t believe he’s gone. He was the first… I would not be… I… I owe him everything.” 

Tonks squeezed his hand gently.

“Minerva’s right, you know,” he continued. “He did encourage this. Us. But, he also never would have fired me, would have fought for me until the governors kicked me out. He believed I deserved many things that I did not.”

“Why don’t you think you deserve this?”

“Oh, Dora,” he said. “I want so much for you. I want you to have the love and the family you deserve. I would tear your life asunder.”

“It’s too late,” she said, “I’m already in pieces without you."

“Why do you not see what I see? You could lose your job, your parents. You have everything before you.”

“Why don’t you see what I see? The kindest, most brilliant man…”

“I am not kind. I can be ruthless and callous and I am not just referring my wolf form.”

“I’m quite aware of your dark side. Maybe I like that. I am descended from the Noble and Ancient House of Black, after all.”

He smiled in spite of himself. “I never could never assert any control over Sirius, and I’m finding the same of you. Perhaps it is indeed that ancient Slytherin blood. Of course, I miss Sirius deeply, but my life… My life always moved forward, always found a purpose because of Dumbledore."

“He gave you opportunities, you’re the one who seized them. Harry told me you were the best teacher he ever had.”

“Harry's stronger than all of us. He's facing so much.” Remus said, then began to cry softly. “I wish James could see what Harry's become. I wish..." He trailed off. Then swallowed and took Tonks's hand between his. "Everyone who has ever loved me has died, Dora. I- couldn't take it..."

"You can't save me," Tonks said. "I know I can't save you either. We've both chosen to put ourselves in the middle of this war. But, why can't we try? Be together while... while we can?"

He held her hand and didn't say anything for several minutes. Tears still streamed down his face. Tonks looked up at the branches of the Willow. "How did you get it to still?"

"There's so much you don't know about me..." He said. "This is my tree. Dumbledore had Hagrid plant it when I was to come to Hogwarts. There's a tunnel beneath it. It was used to protect students from my transformations." 

"Where does it lead?"

"Would you like to see?" Remus asked, knowing that leaving the grounds would be a faint distraction from his grief. 

"Yes," she said. 

"Do you see this knot?" He said. "This is what stills the willow. And just below it is the tunnel. Slide in, and I'll follow."

She slid into the tunnel with him behind her. They crouched until they had to crawl up the slope, and he tried not to admire her behind as they reached the end of the passage. 

He helped her into the room. She clambered up and examined their surroundings.

"Remus," she said as she touched the claw slash marks across the torn up the wallpaper. "We're in the Shrieking Shack, aren't we?"

He recognized the pained look on her face from when she had first seen his scars. 

"I was very young when I did most of this damage," he said. "Before Sirius and James were able to take me out."

She approached Remus and placed her hands on his chest. "Can I ask you something?" She looked up at him. 

He swallowed. "Yes."

"Why did you come over at Christmas?" 

He paled, ashamed. "I hadn't intended to bed you. I heard about your patronus. You always berate me for my self-pity and there you were spending the holiday alone. I wanted to remind you of all the reasons you should forget about me. But you looked at me like no one had ever looked at me before. Like I was oxygen. And I was weak." He'd fucked her that night like he had when they were first together, from behind, clothed and desperate. 

"Do you still love me, then?" She asked. "Or do you just love being loved?"

"Don't you understand? I love you so much that I despise your feelings for me. I don't want you to love me. You should revile me."

"You left me, and it hurt so much, Remus, I tried to hate you, to imagine the worst of you and the worst case for me if I was with you. I couldn't- I can't bring myself to care. I just want you. I want a life with you. Will you have me? Please?"

Her eyes were so deep and concerned. He reached up and ran a hand through her limp brown hair that looked so much like his before it had begun to grey. "I don't want you to be in pain," he said, tracing his thumb along her thin, pale lips.

"Accept my love," she said, and he nodded once before crashing his lips onto hers, sucking her in, trying to pull her love from her body as if he were a dementor. He had to bend to reach her and she arched into him, desperate to keep contact, as tipped her head back and pressed his fingers against her scalp. He devoured her lips and thrust his tongue roughly against hers. 

He was angry and pained and aroused and euphoric to be with her again. 

She was tugging at his robes, and he shrugged them off without breaking contact with her lips. Fingers fumbled buckles and buttons and slipped off shoes and soon they were nude before each other, pressing their bodies into one another as if they could get close enough to merge. 

Tonks took his cock in her hand and deftly ran her hand up and down it. She slid the foreskin up over the top and rubbed the bit of liquid that had pooled there with her thumb. "Dora," he moaned against her lips. He felt her smile at his reaction.

And suddenly she was on her knees in front of him, one hand still wrapped around his member, the other reaching high on his chest. "You don't have to..." he said, but before he could finish his statement, her lips were wrapped around him, warm and wet. She took only the head in her mouth and slid her tongue in circle over his glans, poking it softly at the opening. He shuddered. She pulled off of him and smiled up still holding his cock tightly. He was fully hard now, throbbing in her fist. 

"You like that," she said. A statement, not a question. He had never let her go down on him before. There was something too intimate, too vulnerable. As if she might taste him and remember that he wasn't fully human. But the way her pupils dilated and her cheeks flushed and her nipples tightened, he knew that even just this small taste had aroused her as well. He nodded, without breaking eye contact. 

"This is just for you," she said. She glided her mouth over him, slowly back and forth, taking more of him each time. He wove his fingers into her hair and experimented putting a slight bit of pressure to suggest her rhythm on him. When she hummed, "mmm-hmmm" as he pushed to the back of her mouth, he took it as his permission to guide her on. She had one hand wrapped around the base of his shaft and another, lightly cupping his balls. Why had he discouraged this? He felt his abs clench as he pulled her head all the way down to feeling his cock against her tonsils. 

"Wait... Wait, I want..." He panted and she stood, stroking her saliva over his member.

"What do you want, Remus?" He shuddered. She tightened the hand his balls, gripping them firmly enough to toe the line between pleasure and pain. "Tell me."

"I want to be inside you," he moaned, desperately, as if she had tortured the confession from him. 

"I want you inside me, too," she whispered.

He wrapped his hands around her bottom and lifted her so she could snake her legs around his back to hold herself up. 

She slid onto him. "Gods, I missed you," he groaned, relishing her tightness, her wetness. He pressed his face between her small breasts, pert with their youth. He sucked gently on one nipple and the other, listening to her mewl. She leaned down to kiss him as he rocked them together, thrusting up into her. The feeling of her mouth on his, her hands in his hair, her naked legs squeezing him tight intoxicating him. 

There was no pain now, no grief, no war. Just her and him and the creaking the floorboards as they moved together. A light sheen of sweat covered their bodies. He could feel her heating up and moaning softly with pleasure as his pelvic bone pressed into her clit, and she shuddered against him, her long, plum, curly hair sticking to her neck and back in the stuffy June air. Her head rested on his shoulder and he released her legs. He pulled himself from her as he helped her stand, their sweaty, naked bodies, leaning against one another for strength, his erection, harder than ever, pressing into her belly, covered in her cum. 

"Your hair," he said, taking it his fingers to show her. She smiled and pressed her cheek into his palm. 

"Thank you," she whispered, kissing his hand. 

He rubbed his erection against her. "You are so beautiful," he said, pressing his lips to her neck and squeezing his fingers into her hips. 

She moved to pull him to the floor. 

"Wait," he said. He grabbed his cloak from the the pile of clothes and laid it out so they would not have to lie on the musty, splintered floorboards. 

"C'mon," she said, and took his hand as she lay on her back inside his cloak. 

"I can't resist," he said and dropped to his knees to lick her folds, savoring her smell and taste and the way she whimpered, already tender and swollen from her first orgasm. 

"Why did I let you go," he said against her. "All I want is you."

She was perfectly relaxed in his cloak. Her hair wasn't the only thing that had taken metamorphosis since she had come. She no longer had a sickly pallor, but was glowing peach and tan again. Her breasts had swelled, her nipples dark berries upon them, and her hips and waist formed a slick hourglass. She was a woman, not a girl, before him. 

He climbed to lay beside her on the cloak, and trailed his fingers from her opening, spreading her wetness up over her clit then her mons and swirling a finger around her belly button and up to her clavicle. He placed a warm, wet kiss on the pulse point of her neck while he slid a hand over her breast, and she sighed with pleasure. 

"Are you ready for more?" He asked. 

"Mm-hmm," she nodded and pulled his head up to kiss his mouth, slowly and deliberately. 

He moved over her and slid back inside. He had never been on top of her before, never that act of possession, which allowed her to writhe beneath him, undone by his power. Missionary had always seemed a schoolboy's errand to Remus, a position designed to put focus on holding up his body so he wouldn't finish too quickly.

But now, as he thrust into her, stronger and harder and faster, he felt he was claiming something. Claiming control over his life. Claiming the shrieking shack as a place of pleasure instead of pain. Claiming Dora not as the poor the girl who had stupidly followed him to bed, but his true partner. 

"Mine," he cried as he came, jerkily and suddenly. 

He collapsed on top of her, crushing her into the floor, their hearts pounding against one another. He felt himself softening inside her and gasped when he looked between them and saw his cum smearing from her opening, dripping onto her thigh. 

"No," he said. "Nymphadora, I forgot -" His mind was racing. 

"What?" She said, still dazed, looking down at his concern. "Oh, your cloak. I'll get it cleaned up, love." 

"No, no," he was on his knees. "I could have... infected you."

"Remus," she said. "If Fenrir Greyback can take a bite out of someone without really affecting them, I'm not worried about a bit of semen." 

He wrestled his wand from his cloak pocket, "Ter-tergio," he said. 

"Calm down," she said. "Here," she grasped his hand, and he felt her nonverbally channel her magic through his hand and wand. The semen was syphoned from her as if it were a pensieve memory. 

He was still distressed. "Please don't panic," she said, climbing to her knees to face him and cupping his face between her hands. She forced him to look into her eyes. "It's okay." She pulled him into a hug and shuddered a sob against her. 

"I'm so sorry," he said against her shoulder. "I don't want to hurt you." 

"I love you," she said. "When I say I don't care that you think you're too dangerous, this is what I mean. I love you and I want you no matter what that means. You don't have to be paranoid."

He grasped her tightly. "Do you- Do you promise?" It was strange, to have their roles reversed. To be looking so desperately for validation from her when, for the past year, he had been the one running away. 

"Of course I promise. I'd marry you tomorrow," she said. 

"Will you?" he said. 

"What?" She said pulling back to look at him. 

"Will you marry me tomorrow?"

"Remus," her eyes filled with tears. It was her turn to sob. "Yes. Yes, please, it's all I want." They held each other there, laughing and crying and kissing. 

They dressed and she brought him back to the room she rented in Hogsmead. They showered and ate cheese and tomato sandwiches for dinner, then snuggled against each other in her bed. 

He tried to push thoughts of Dumbledore and Greyback and the war from his head, but his chest began to ache with fears and grief. As if she could hear his thoughts, Tonks slid against him, resting her head in the nook under his chin. Relief flooded him as if she was absorbing the pain from its epicenter. 

"Thank you," he said, "for not letting me be alone tonight." 

"Thank you for letting me in," she said.

And not knowing the pain or joy that lay ahead, they waited for morning to come.


End file.
